
Why maid lies
Some employers said that they found out their helpers always like to lie, and the lies are usually not a smart lie. This article reveals the reasons why some helpers like to lie, please try to solve accordingly.
1. Fear of being scolded
Most helpers who like
to lie may have working experience with stern employers before. As the helpers’
education level are not high and many of them worked as farmer before, they come
to work as maid directly instead of working in factory/office, most of them lack
of social skills. So they are easily to panic when employers questioning them, they
want to protect themselves by telling lies.
Helper L, one day she forgot to sterilize the milk bottle after washing, when facing the questioning from employer, she was panic and lied that she already did. Actually it was not a big deal if she admitted her mistake and promised that she would take notice next time. She insisted she did the job and cried for long time. Employer got angry and send her back. The helper lost job by just telling the small meaningless lie.The employer is not angry about the helper forgot to sterilize the milk bottle, but the lie.
In this case, we
suggest employer first calm down and communicate with her helper that she/he
can accept her negligence sometimes as long as the consequence was not that serious,
but lying may cause trust issue, make it very clear to maid that lying is much worse
than negligence at work.
2. Weak position
In Singapore, most
helpers are in weak position.
Employer do not
satisfy with the helper can send her back without giving a reason.
Some helpers come to Singapore with low salary and only 1 to 2 rest days per month, after they completed contract they would like to negotiate with the employer that they want raise in salary and more rest days. Some employers don’t want and they don’t allow the helpers to transfer to other employers but sending them home.
Under this circumstance,
many helpers don’t know how to communicate with their employers, they just take
and follow the orders from employers. They cannot relax and always be very
tense and nervous when employers were at home, things get worse if they think
they were treated unfairly. Some helpers could have lying issue if they held grudges
and depressed for long.
Maid M, employer raised her request no handphone during interview and the helper agreed. When the helper reached employer’s house she handed over her phone to the employer. After working for some time the helper asked for permission to get the phone back and promised she would only use after work but employer refused. Later employer found the helper bought another handphone and lied.
If this is the
case, the employer needs to pay more attention to the helper's emotion and take
the initiative to communicate with her, most unfair cases were just
misunderstanding. Please do not ignore helper’s emotion problem, let her feel
that employer cares about her.
3. Don’t know how to say no
Facing some requests/invitation from employers, few helpers has guts to say no, especially the helpers know that the employers’ requests/invitation are with good intentions.
Employer H, likes to share snack/food with her helper, the helper didn’t like but she acted as she liked because she didn’t know how to express her unwillingness. One day the employer found out the snack unopened lying in trash can, she was furious and scolded the helper, she could not understand why the helper cannot just say she don’t like, the employer won’t waste the money buying for her.
Different people
has different understanding of what is good. What an employer can do is to
respect the helper as an independent person. As long as the helper feels that
their employers respect her and she has no fear to express her thoughts she won’t
lie.
In short, no
employer likes a helper who lies. One lie exposed, there won’t be any trust left.
Employers can also
inform helpers before hiring them that their bottom line is they cannot accept helpers
lying, which can lead to sending back.
If you found out helper
lying, don’t panic, try to solve the problem by the above ways, good luck in
hiring!